


Breathe

by LazySintastic13 (EmeraldWriter)



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell, Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Underfell Sans, Undertale Monsters on the Surface, kustard - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 14:40:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15075326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldWriter/pseuds/LazySintastic13
Summary: Coming home late from a shitty job, worked to the bone ...There was only so much Red could take.So he breathes.





	Breathe

**Author's Note:**

  * For [silverryu25](https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverryu25/gifts).



Unlocking the door, Red breathed out a sigh of relief. It was already so late. It was morning—3 am to be exact. And quietly, he got his shoes off and placed his bag and jacket onto the coat rack.

His movements impressively slow that a snail might even win. Maybe it was to keep quiet, or maybe it was the fatigue wearing down on him, or maybe both. Red didn’t really care.

He simply plopped himself on the couch, and closed his eyes when he leaned back; his weight sinking into the leather.

Red didn’t want to think about anything, but left with silence—left with his ever-so _helpful_ chatterbox companion called his thoughts, it was pointless to think that he’d really catch a break.

It has been … a couple years since monster were able to integrate themselves with the humans in the Surface. But there was still unavoidable discrimination that couldn’t be quelled nor forgotten over time. And there wasn’t really anything they could do about it, because humans were the majority.

It didn’t help that the more … or should he say ‘used to be’ violent monsters like himself, received a negative reception. Having to actually require going through a _mandatory_ rehabilitation to be … ‘civil’.

Red scoffed when he first heard while his brother had been livid with the stupidity of the idea. It wasn’t as if they couldn’t be civil. It wasn’t as if they _chose_ to live such a lifestyle. It was simply just how their world worked. It was their ‘normality’. Just how the animals of the wild followed a code of survival of the fittest, with their circumstances, so did they.

There wasn’t anything wrong with them, but the humans made it seem like there was. That they needed help.

And Red was stopped from lashing out from the overwhelming piteous, and at the same time hateful gazes.

Because of this, he didn’t even know if the Surface was any better than living in the Underground.

The discrimination towards his kind was evident; low-paying jobs, unfair time schedules, unnegotiable vacation, and you’re not even getting paid overtime in most establishments. This was not to say that humans don’t understand this kind of treatment too. This was to say that this accounted for _all_ monsters; whether you have talent or skill, whether you were _born_ for the job—a monster will still have a hard time getting promoted regardless of their achievements. He should know, his brother had worked his ass tiredly just to finally get the job as a _mall cop_.

Well, at the very least his brother was more than well-off. Unlike him, who got stuck as a school janitor.

Just the reminder made him even more tired than before. He wasn’t allowed to use magic, and no matter the mess, he was called for all of it to be cleaned up. He swore that there was supposed to be two more janitors other than him, but they seemed to be ghosts because he ain’t seen them after the first week of working there.

And he had  _tried_ to apply elsewhere.

But even if … even if he had the qualifications, no one bothered to give it a second thought. Always eyeing him with disdain, fear, disgust. Maybe it was his sharp teeth? Maybe the fact that he could use magic? Maybe the fact that he was skeleton? Red never knew the exact reason, but he never got a call back for even an interview with any of them.

The only … The only reason Red even had a job was because …

The short skeleton inhaled and exhaled. No, he shouldn’t bother remembering the how’s.

 … He hadn’t even told his partner about it, let alone his brother. Always changing the subject when it came to him.

But god, he was so tired of it all. What was the point of working when you’re barely even getting paid? Red can’t remember the last time he was the one to pitch in to pay for the shit around the house. And god forbid that Sans would nag him about it.

The only reason he still bothered to keep trying was because of Sans and his brother. He didn’t want to let them down. He didn’t want to give up because of them. He just—

Red didn’t realize he had been crying until his eyes began to hurt and his cheeks felt cold; quietly sobbing from the stress—from _everything_.

Red clutched his chest, and took deep breaths to calm his frayed nerves.

He could do this.

He could still keep going.

But when he remembered what happened today, Red felt all his strength leave—deflating like a balloon.

That’s right. Today, he was even _fired._

Stars. Red wanted to laugh at the shitload after shitload of bullshit. Working for four years as a janitor, tolerating the cruel jeers, the sneers, the reprimanding—continuing to work even after the humiliating names, how no matter what he did, it would only be acknowledge as ‘decent’, and that was the most praise he’s ever received. For four fucking years.

And now, they _fired_ him for a mistake he didn’t even do.

Red just—

He teleported straight to Sans’ and his shared room, right by Sans’ side by the bed.

Red didn’t bother to wipe the hot tears that continued to stream down his cheeks as his hand hesitantly hovered in the air, as if wanting—helplessly needing to reach out.

They talked about this. Red knew and understood, but it was much harder to act on it. He wanted to talk about it to Sans, he wanted to tell him what’s been happening with him … but he also couldn’t suppress the worthless monster deeply-rooted in his soul that he didn’t want to be a bother—a burden.  

Sans had already done so much, and it wasn’t as if he, too, wasn’t dealing with the bullshit thrusted upon their kind. Sans paid for most of their bills, and not once did he complain about the overload of the responsibility he had to manage. His partner even had three jobs, and was managing them along with spending time with family and friends, and Red felt all the more unworthy for having such a partner.

 _Ah, fuck._ Red can’t go on like this.

Suddenly, both hands clutched onto his chest, the pounding of his soul seemed loud in the quiet room. His cries became choked, and he was suddenly finding it harder and harder to breathe.

Red’s mouth hang open as if it will all be better if he could just get one gulp of air to soothe his aching chest. But it didn’t become easy, only adding to the growing emptiness he was feeling. He faintly heard the sounds of his own gasps and wheezes, and now felt as if he were subjected to some sick game. His soul pounded hard, thrashing about, wanting to be freed from its cage—to _breathe_.

His breath whistled past as he greedily sucked in all the air he could attain, and was only met with another wave of pain.

“S … Sa …” The name couldn’t make it pass his mouth. The tears continued to slide absentmindedly down his cheeks.

 _“Just give up._ ”

The voice rang in his head.

_“No more pain. No more suffering.”_

_No. Stop. I—_

_“It would be easier if you just_ killed _yourself.”_

Red lunged for Sans desperately, startling the other awake and possibly became just as stressed from the suddenness of it.

“H-Huh?! What? R-Red?” Sans, though a bit muddle-headed, instinctively embraced his lover. “Wha—” He was interrupted when he heard the loud gasp from his partner and his mind became all too clear at what happened.

“S-Sa- _hic_ -ans.” Red sniffled and hiccupped in his choked sobs, continuing to breathe fast; his nerves were too frazzled.

“Hey, hey. Shhh. It’s okay. I’m right here. It’s okay.” Sans gingerly pulled Red onto the bed, positioning them so that Red was on top of him, maintaining their embrace. He rubbed his lover’s back, whispering words of comfort.

It might’ve been only a couple of minutes, it might’ve been hours. Sans didn’t really care. He just kept at it until Red calmed to quiet sniffles. His soul twisted at the sight, he himself feeling distressed, possibly even more so than Red was, now.

“Do you … want to talk about it now?” Sans had to ask. It wasn’t that they were never going to talk about it, but if only Red was currently feeling up to discussing it.

Red, on the other hand, became drowsy, and even more exhausted than he ever thought possible after his panic episode. His hoarse and raspy voice came out as mere whispers. “I … should.”

“Okay.” Sans simply stayed quiet and waited.  

“… Got fired. Today. Wasn’t even m’ fault.”

Sans tightened his hold on Red, but didn’t say anything. Opting to listen to hear the whole story.

“‘M just … tired. Of everything Sans.”

Sans hummed in question, his heart breaking at the sight of his lover crying once more.

“J-Just _hic_ everyt-thing. ‘ts so hard. C-Can’t even _hic_ h-help you. Even though y-you _hic_ work so much. P-Pay for eve- _hic-_ vrything. A-And I just…” Red couldn’t continue when he ended up becoming a blubbering mess.

It pained Sans to see this, but he knew that Red needed to let it all out. So he didn’t stop him, even if his soul pricked with each tear that fell.

Red took a breath. “I … When I got the … idea … to kill myself—”the skeleton felt and heard Sans’ gasp. “I woke y-you up.” Though his vision was partially blurred, he met the other’s gaze. “‘cuz I know i-it’s really bad w-when it got to that point.” Hands tightly gripped at his lover’s shirt. “Needed to t-tell you. T-Talking is key, right?” Red let out a watery smile. “N-Not alone … A-And I love you so… You n-need to know.”

Sans didn’t stop his own tears from falling. “Stars. Y-Yeah. You’re right. T-Thank you. Thank you for t-telling me. I love you. I l-love you Red.” Sans pushed them both upright, keeping Red in his lap against his chest. He began kissing him all over the face; from the mouth, cheeks, nose, eyes, and head—over and over. And all the while, he was whispering how much he loved him, how thankful he was, and how he was proud of Red’s courage to talk about it.

They were both a mess that Red couldn’t help but let out a small laugh, albeit tiredly, when the pressure inside him just slowly began to evaporate. He felt lighter as if he were on clouds, and feeling that made him bury his head against Sans’ shoulder.

He glanced at the side, and saw the time on their alarm clock. “… It’s 6.”

Sans turned to look. “… It’s 6.”

“… Your wor—”

“Day off. Sleeping in. The whole shebang.”

Red chuckled and didn’t question it. “Okay.”

Sans laid them both down on the bed, and tucked them in. And even though both of them were probably really tired, Red couldn’t help but ask, “Sans?”

“Hmm?”

“Sing me a lullaby?”

It was childish. And something he’d never really ask. But he really enjoyed hearing Sans hum and sing. It calmed him.

“Sure thing sweetheart.”

“And …”

“Hmm?”

“I’ll sing one for you too next time.”

Sans blinked, before smiling warmly. “Okay.”

“And Sans?”

“Yeah?”

Red said it softly, but the underlying firmness of his words remained strong and clear. “I got you too.”

If he ever needed to cry.

If everything becomes too much.

If he ever wanted to just say fuck it all.

Red would be there for him.

“I know you do.”

**Author's Note:**

> It's short but hope you like it! XD


End file.
